Sunday, June 15, 2014

Penis

A picture of a penis with a message that reads " Hey Sexy "

Yup, that's all there was.

I have a profile on Okcupid and this was the first time I got a message from someone who's profile picture was just a penis. Nothing more, nothing less.

Really? Does that ever work? Seriously, can someone tell me? It's not that I'm a prude or anything. Far from it I think, maybe bordering on a bit promiscuous but just a penis, nothing more? That's just lame, dude!

I get a lot of the " Hey sexy, " and usually there is a photo of them mostly naked or a picture of them drinking a beer or with their arm around a girl. What goes through your mind at that point?

" Hey, I'm looking for a girl to date/sleep with/marry. Maybe I should put this picture of me with another girl and not explain that it's my sister/cousin/niece/aunt/mother. Yeah, that'll get the chicks, " No! No it won't! No chicks for you ( except for the one in that picture, I guess )!

Some of the other great ones I've received:

" Do you like strawberries or blueberries? I wanna know what to put in the pancakes tomorrow morning, " This from a 22 year old. A little presumptuous?

" I would love to eat you out, " At least he's honest.

" You're hot. Wanna fuck? " No, no I do not.

My favourites though are the one word ones consisting of " Sup, " Yup, apparently that is an actual word now and they're not even punctuating it properly. If you want to do it right, it's spelled " S'up. "

That leads to another thing. The English language is great! Please try a bit to use real words. I am not perfect at it but damn, I try hard to use real words and proper punctuation.

Rant done.

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